Published on: August 1, 2023

Reading time by: 7 minutes

Meet Charu Seth, a Transformational and Transitional Life Coach and CEO of “Thrive Transform.” Her journey of divorcing a long-term marriage after 20+ years has shaped her in profound ways. The emotional pain, social upheaval, and mental challenges she faced were immense, but they presented an opportunity for growth and positive change. Through self-awareness and therapy, Charu overcame depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder, emerging emotionally resilient and mentally focused.

Therapy played a pivotal role in her transformation, providing a safe space to explore her feelings and develop coping mechanisms. Charu’s journey of rebuilding and transforming her own life significantly influences her approach as a Life Coach and CEO. Her struggles have given her empathy, resilience, and problem-solving skills, enabling her to connect with her clients on a deeper level and inspire them not to give up on their own journeys.

As a woman disrupting the notion that life ends after divorce, Charu faced challenges, including financial instability and societal expectations. However, she defied stereotypes, empowered herself, and incorporated boundaries to create a successful new chapter in her life. She uses her personal experience and certifications in NLP to help individuals reach their full potential, foster healthier communities, and encourage continuous learning and personal growth in both her life coaching process and her own life. Charu’s story serves as an inspiring example of how transformation and self-belief can lead to a fulfilling and purposeful life.

Can you tell us about your journey of divorcing a long-term marriage after 20+ years and how it has shaped you?

Divorce after a long-term marriage can be a very difficult and challenging experience. It caused a great deal of emotional pain, social upheaval, but at the same time it gave me an opportunity for growth and positive change. Emotionally it was a draining experience: that caused feelings of anger, guilt, grief, sadness and loneliness. Mentally it led to severe anxiety (fight or flight mode) , depression, and post- traumatic disorder. Being a stay-at-home parent for a long time had its own ups and downs. As much as I cherished the experience of nurturing my kids,and family, upon divorce I was reinventing myself, and challenged to rebuild my life. Prior to divorce, my priorities were always my family, my partner’s success, and growth. Upon divorce I had many discoveries, that it no longer had to be that way. I wanted to create and carve my independent space, and build a new ME. I began the journey of self-awareness and growth, by introspection, and questioning my life’s purpose. This journey led me to a wonderful therapist in my life, with whose support and encouragement, I began studying Positive Psychology, Cognitive Behavior, Organizational Behavior, Entrepreneurship program, and finally NLP Life Coaching all in the hopes to be a Life Coach.

Today emotionally, I’m resilient, stable, assertive and stronger, mentally. I’m more focused, and passionate about my purpose. Physically I’m taking care of my health by leading a healthier lifestyle: at gym, or exploring outdoor activities towards a new Charu 2.0 version.

The failure of my marriage has further deepened my belief in building healthier strong communities for our children and youth, by focusing on work life balance and choices that determine our lives.

What role did therapy play in helping you overcome mental, and emotional stresses during your darkest phase?

Therapy provided me a safe and supportive space to explore my feelings, emotions, thoughts and experiences. It helped me in developing coping mechanisms to deal with depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and improving my mental health overall. My therapist identified my low self- esteem, and confidence whilst I also possessed the traits of being a highly intuitive, and empathetic person ready to transform. My fear of “ what’s’ next”, “how will I do it”? shifted to :” I’m looking for a new beginning” “ I want to make a change”, and “I want to grow from within”. Therapy brought a self- awareness within me wherein I began to understand myself, and this helped me have a better relationship with myself. My fears gave birth to curiosity and the desire to surprise and challenge my older version of me that was built on low self- esteem, confidence and self- doubt while I was married. I realized my long term marriage didn’t provide me a nurturing environment to THRIVE and with therapy, I redefined that as one of my biggest goals in life.

What inspired you to pursue a career as a life coach, and how did you recognize your superpowers of intuition and empathy?

It wasn’t just the collapse of my partnership, but the end of a friendship that impacted me and my young children. Emotionally, and mentally it was the biggest life altering experience. I started recognizing not constructive patterns, and behaviors and wanted to make a positive change in my life. The journey of self- introspection that led me to a therapist was a game changer. My initial purpose was to understand my triggers, and modify my behaviors all in the hopes of salvaging my marriage. During that process I realized that it wasn’t my responsibility to change someone, or be accountable for their actions/choices. I couldn’t help them if they didn’t want to be helped. I learnt that making a choice or a decision undoubtedly shapes one’s life. This was my aha! moment “We’ve to live with the choices we make, good or bad, that determines the quality of our lives”, became my mantra.

My therapist encouraged and motivated me to pursue Life Coaching since I had evolved and healed myself from many traumas in life with a deeper understanding and self- awareness. During my sessions with her I relied heavily on empathy and intuition, and that became my anchor, and could be well utilized as a Life Coach. I channelized my disappointment, anger, frustration, rejection from my failed marriage to being more empathetic, for myself, and my ex. My self- doubt, and low self-esteem gave rise to a more confident woman, who used her instinct to guide her.

Covid hit, and tore apart many families. Teens, and adolescents took the brunt of it with changing family dynamics. Families were struggling: mentally and emotionally. During that phase I began coaching teens and adolescents to help them navigate a tough time and guide them mentally and emotionally to become a better version of themselves. Empowering youth and families with my superpowers: intuition and empathy restored my belief that I was best suited to be a Life Coach.

Can you share your vision as the CEO of your company and the steps you are taking to build stronger communities?

My vision as the CEO of my company- “Thrive Transform” is to help people reach their full potential, by fostering and building healthier communities. I want to see families, professionals, and youth achieve their goals: both personal, professional, academic, mental, and emotional by being the drivers of their own transformations. To empower them to navigate through various transitions in life by providing them with necessary NLP techniques/ tools, and required support. As a coach and a CEO I am taking the necessary steps as follows:

Help them with goal setting
Provide accountability
Help them overcome challenges
Bring self-awareness
Help them with confidence

Coaching helps me fulfill my passion to help build healthy communities: educational institutions, parents, children and youth by being the bridge and the facilitator. I believe we can reach the full potential of our communities if we can support, encourage and openly discuss issues/ challenges faced within them, and create supportive and non judgmental ways to build healthy emotional, and mental individuals.

Some of the ways to achieve healthy communities:

Help individuals make positive changes
Promote healthy relationships
Building social capital
Advocating for social change

By taking these necessary steps as a Transformational and Transitional Life Coach I can make a real difference in the health and well-being of my communities

How does your certification in NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Practices) contribute to your effectiveness as a Life Coach?

NLP is a set of techniques that can be used to improve: communication, change behavior, and achieve goals.

Effectiveness of NLP certification:

Improved Communication: How to communicate effectively with clients which entails: Active Listening, (RAS) Reticular Activating System, build rapport, and deliver feedback in a way that is both supportive and challenging
Increased self-awareness: NLP helps me to understand how my clients thoughts, feelings and behaviors impact their interaction with others This can lead to more effective coaching and responding to my clients needs appropriately
Enhanced problem- Solving skills with NLP to identify and solve problems, learn how to reframe, generate new solutions, mindset change, and overcome limiting beliefs
Improved Motivation: Motivate my clients to take action and achieve their goals

How has your personal journey of rebuilding and transforming your own life influenced your approach as a Life Coach and CEO?

With my personal struggles, and challenges it gave me an opportunity to connect and understand my clients challenges better. My struggles have helped me build self-awareness, critical thinking and problem solving skills. I can empathize with my clients’ challenges by providing them a safe and non judgmental path to shift. Goal setting and making right choices was a part of my rebuilding and transformation. My childhood struggles, and experience as a single parent has taught me to be resilient, perseverant, and create a positive and healthy work life balance. As a Life Coach and a divorced single mom I possess: Empathy,authenticity, and inspiration to show to my clients that anything is possible, if they are willing to work hard, never give up, and make the right choices. These are also the qualities that I have as a CEO who has worked on herself to transform, begin a new chapter, motivate and lead with example.

What challenges have you faced as a woman disrupting the concept of life ending after divorce, and how do you plan to overcome them?

Divorce is a very challenging experience, and I’ve not been an exception to it. There were unique struggles I faced not only as a woman but also as a SAHM ( stay at home) parent for long. This meant the threat of financial instability, because I had made a conscious choice to be the caregiver to my kids: emotionally, mentally and physically.

Emotional, mental distress and depression took a strong hold of me, where I had low self-esteem, confidence and self-worth. To be surrounded with family and friends who were leading normal lives, led me to social isolation for a while, but I overcame that by working on myself: emotionally, mentally, by seeing a therapist. I wanted to be a stronger and better version of myself and began learning and researching about psychology, cognitive behavior, and other aspects that led me to NLP certification.

My emotional well-being was connected to my physical fitness. I chose to associate and participate actively with groups that led a healthier lifestyle in outdoor,and other fitness activities. The transition from a SAHM mom to a single parent and the transformation that came within me was a new journey as a woman. It had its challenges, and sometimes my status quo was questioned with “Am I good enough”? “Am I a good single mom”? “Can I do it”? These nagging fears and questions, along with my boys going through their inner struggles themselves, was at times daunting. I was rebuilding my life, transitioning to a new role.

Balancing my inner struggles with my family’s expectations “ role of a mom”, to society’s expectations, and stereotypes : “ it’s tough after divorce” “how will you manage as a single mom”? This narrative needed an overhaul. Better equipping myself with studies, and skills was the key to success. Believing that “I could do it too” was my first deliverance. The mindset change: “I can have it all” without feeling guilty, was the next shift.

At home I started incorporating boundaries with my teen boys, and began integrating it in my life. This certainly was confusing to them, it brought defiance, behavioral differences, about “mom’s boundaries”, because now I was repositioning myself as a working mom. To them mom’s duties and responsibilities were static, and her priorities: “FAMILY comes first”, because I had modeled that. I had to break that glass ceiling to “what women can do”, and not feel guilty about. I was evolving from a SAHM to a working parent, and so were some of my values in the process. I no longer felt the need to please, be validated for my choices and decisions. My modeling behavior included : Equality in gender: mom can have her dreams just as dads do, and respect for time & boundaries.

Gender biases as working women are real, and I’ve had to deal with it at home, but it’s my responsibility to model the right behavior, and reframe the right message inside out. Life for me didn’t end after my divorce if anything I began to thrive. I grew in confidence, that came from my self-worth, and self- belief, I had an amazing mentor in life who helped disrupt this concept that life as a divorced woman was a stigma. I’m surrounded by empowered positive people, who have been a source of constant encouragement, and women who have been my strongest advocates, and cheerleaders in this beautiful fulfilled journey.

How do you inspire and empower others to believe in themselves and not give up on their own journeys?

I began my journey through introspection, self-awareness, and then began rebuilding and transforming my life. From SAHM- a single working mom, it has been a yo-yo ride with teens and I’m learning in this process. To acknowledge, accept, and evolve is growth. Working on myself through internal engineering: self- realization, goal setting, setting realistic expectations, boundaries, and above all working on my relationship with myself, and my kids has been an eye opener. My connection with my children had to be reestablished and synced with a new role of an ambitious woman wishing to fulfill her goal with some support from her family and tribe.

I’m learning it’s ok! To fall, and make mistakes, for then I will truly understand growth. To persevere in the face of adversity/challenges opens many doors of self-awareness and confidence
By being authentic, empathetic, and focused on my learning and growth has been instrumental in shaping who I am, and eliminating what I do not want to attract. It’s important to know how and what we attract through our energy, action, and our mindset thinking, and that became the pillar of my identity
Our values, and core beliefs, become our foundation, that needs to be strengthened with the right kind of people who support, encourage and believe in the same. If we communicate to be heard and understood, we will always receive the same. This will enhance our personal and professional relationship
Life is all about alignment: personal and professional life. Prioritizing your family and loved one’s over work. Nurturing those relationships, gives you dividends and fulfillment that no job can provide for a lifetime. After all “a job is a job” you are not indispensable. The sooner one learns, accepts and balances between both one is ready for success, and leads a purposeful life.
Never compare our journeys to other’s, because our challenges are never going to be the same, and we are the authors of our stories

Being empathetic, assertive, self- assured, confident and resilient has been my weapons for self- growth and an authentic self. I believe if I can do it, so can others by following their dreams, recognizing their authentic self, and not comparing their lives to others. I strongly believe that “right choices, and decisions determine the quality of our lives”, and every single day I choose the path that’s “the road not taken” to discover myself.

Can you discuss the importance of continual learning and personal growth in both your life coaching process and your own life?

Continual learning & personal growth are important in both areas of life: life coaching and personal life:

Develop new skills and knowledge: With constant change, it’s important to stay ahead of the curve, and learn the trends and patterns. This has helped me in my personal life : building confidence, and as a Life coach: learning new technical skills/ studying an entrepreneurship program helped me with my life coaching business plan
Improve problem solving skills: This means learning new ways to think, out of the box, that I’m employing personally and professionally
Increase self-awareness: Self realization leads to inner growth and self-worth. New skills helped me build confidence, and growth.
Become more adaptable: The ability to change, along with continuous learning, growth and adapting to deal with challenges, and the transitions has become pivotal in my life. To know when to pivot, and shift internally in alignment with external growth has been very significant in my life as a working woman and a mom

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